Define finicky how to#
The challenge for me is: how to adapt the French approach (which works so well in France) for families in America? That is one main focus of the book, which sums up the French approach to food education with ten French Kids’ Food Rules. Seven children…wow! Your blog is beautiful–and bilingual too! I entirely agreed with your comments your about manners! 🙂 I was very interested to read your story. Thanks for your email Sarah Jane’s blog is fantastic, isn’t it? I adore her style she created wonderful illustrations for the book. Too often I think parents mistake a true sensory or feeding disorder for picky eating and think their kids will outgrow it it’s only by our determination and work with helping him regulate his system that we’ve got the eater we’ve managed to get! Now, my older one…a “great” eater by most people’s estimation, but has inborn pickiness, mainly because of his sensory issues. That’s my younger child to a T - and while I try to not make too much fuss about it because he’s not yet 3 years old, we HAVE found that by addressing his eating as a behavioral rather than a feeding issue, he’s greatly improved. But you’re absolutely correct that there is a difference between a child who exhibits fear or reluctance to try new foods, craves familiarity, and must be cajoled to step outside of the comfort zone, and a child who sort of hops from food to food, shows no real resistance to most of them, and just wants what he/she wants when he/she wants it. This is a wonderful way to articulate the subtle difference in eating styles that American parents so often overlook - I think we lump all eating issues together into one category, call it “pickiness,” and assume it’s a rite of childhood.
So, are your children picky eaters, or fussy eaters, or both? And how do you deal with it? If my kids don’t like something, I simply tell them: “That’s fine, you’ll like it when you grow up.” I believe it, and I think they believe me! We’ve been working hard over the years at encouraging consistency (so that she eats the things she has already tried and liked), and adventurousness with new foods (still sometimes a challenge, but a lot better than it used to be). The kids soon adapt - and everyone is happier as a result.Ĭan a child be both picky and fussy? Yes, they can! This was the case with our older daughter. Above all, no short order cooking! At lunch (at the school cafeteria) and at home, only one menu is on offer. Being firm and consistent avoids these power struggles. The French don’t tolerate kids’ fussiness about food–which often arises because kids are testing limits, and turning food into a power struggle. But now (and especially with my older daughter) I’m firm: if they’ve liked it in the past, they have to eat it now. Inconsistency is apparently a consistent pattern in toddler behavior, so when my children were younger I let it slide. This sometimes happens with my younger daughter, who ‘likes’ her breakfast oatmeal one day but then (frustratingly) won’t touch it the next. (This works for French kids too check out the amazing French Kids School Lunch menus from schools all over France).įussy eaters, on the other hand, will reject foods that they like one day, but then happily eat them the next. So we say to our kids: “You don’t have to like it, you just have to taste it.” This method has worked for lots of foods (broccoli, beets, salad, cauliflower, lentils) which our kids now happily eat. Note: this doesn’t mean forcing a child to eat, but rather gently, calmly encouraging them to taste something. Researchers have found that tasting foods repeatedly (anywhere from 7 to 15 times) will usually result in acceptance of a new food. Gently encouraging children to continue trying new foods is the key. But the good news is that this is usually a temporary phase. This can result in children eating a limited variety of foods. Children with neophobia often reject many ‘new’ foods. They probably have a degree of what scientists call “food neophobia”, which is generally defined as the reluctance to eat, or even sample, new foods. Picky eaters are very selective about what they eat. One helpful insight I learned in France is the difference between a ‘picky eater’ and a ‘fussy eater’. I spent a lot of time trying to get my children to eat better, and wondering how much of their resistance to new foods was due to power struggles (and therefore negotiable) versus a real resistance to/difficulty in eating new foods (much less negotiable). Often, children refuse to eat specific groups of foods (like vegetables, or fruits), resulting in worried parents and stressful mealtimes.
Many parents report difficulty in feeding their children at some stage.
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